A
big part of my study abroad experience has been to get out of my comfort zone.
I can successfully say that I have been getting out of my comfort zone very
frequently and I’ve been trying a variety of new things that I wouldn’t
regularly try.
If
you know me well, I always try and play it safe. I calculate the risks of each situation
and I try to calculate every single possibility of results that could occur. If
I can’t calculate the outcome or the risk is too high, most of the time I don’t
end up doing the activity. I also like to be very much in control of each
situation. If I can’t control the outcome, once again I won’t participate. For
example, you won’t find me on a roller coaster or any rides for that matter,
walking outside after dark unless I absolutely have to or talking to people
that I don’t know in foreign countries.
By
doing things out of my comfort zone on this trip, I’ve learned a lot about
myself. I usually psych myself out in situations; I overthink a lot of things. I
am stronger that I thought I was and I am grateful that I had the guts to try
new things. There hasn’t been one thing that I’ve tried that I’ve hated. I have
been thankful that I tried them. All of them. In the past, I’ve spent a lot of
time wondering what if. What if about certain events, once in a lifetime
opportunities, and what if I let go of my fears and just had fun.
I
also have been letting go of controlling every situation. I’m learning there is
no sense in me trying to control every situation especially when a lot of situations
that have presented themselves to me are out of my control.
For
the past two weeks, I basically lived without constant Internet access. I
haven’t lived without 24/7 Internet access since I was 8 years old and at that
time, I was not dependent on using the Internet as my main source of
communication. I had no control over the situation nor did I have control of
when it was going to be fixed.
The
wifi in my apartment broke on Wednesday night right before I was going to
sleep. No big deal, I was going to sleep anyways. When I woke up, I tried to do
my daily check of social media. I clicked on my Facebook app realized that
wasn’t working so I decided to check my twitter app, that didn’t work as well
so I moved on to Instagram. It wasn’t until waiting for Instagram to load for a
couple of minutes that I remembered that our entire Internet was down so
nothing was going to work. I continued this same routine every single day, when
I woke up and before I went to sleep, until our wifi was fixed.
Thursday
morning, it really hit me after I put in a request to get the Internet fixed. This
was the weekend before midterms and while I was concerned with communicating
with friends and family. I also had a terrible time trying to study for
midterms because everything that I needed to study was online. Talk about the
irony and terrible timing. We don’t even buy books over here. We go to the
library and scan all the pages and email them to ourselves so even our books
are technically online. Since when did everything for classes switch over to
being online?
A
man came Thursday afternoon to look at it and said that he would give me a call
the following day, Friday. He did not call me on Friday and I was devastated.
Getting the Internet fixed was my number one priority. It was my lifeline:
communication, schoolwork, general knowledge, and entertainment. The Internet
is not as important here in Italy. That is definitely low on their priority
list. If something happens to the Internet, you are extremely lucky to have it
fixed in a week. When I walk around or go to a restaurant, I do not see
Italian’s glued to their phones. They are actually having conversations with
each other.
In the states, I am constantly connected to
wifi and if not wifi then I have a data plan that allows me to use Internet on
the go. There is never a moment when I am not connected. The school is closed on Saturday’s and
Sunday’s but I hoped that he would call on Saturday even though I knew that it
was going to be a long shot.
I
had a birthday dinner right before I left for Italy. At one point of the
dinner, I remember I put my phone down and looked around the table, there was
not one person who was not on their phone. Everyone was glued to his or her
phone scrolling away. It stayed this was for a good 10-15 minutes and all the
while, I just silently watched everyone. It actually shocked me that we could
sit at a dinner in a restaurant and not have any conversations for a good 15
minutes. At the time, I didn’t think that it was that bad. I just started a
conversation and most people put their phones down and we started to talk
again.
By
Monday morning, I had to do something. So I went to the student life office and
together we called the IT office about my apartment’s internet. I received a
temporary mobile hotspot. This allowed my roommates and I to be able to connect
from home again. The problem was there were only five available connections and
six people in total live in my apartment. So there was always one person who
couldn’t be connected. Another problem was the more people that were connected
to it at one time, the slower it ran. You also had to be kind of close to in to
get it to connect.
My
roommates were grateful for the hotspot but I was frustrated. I couldn’t
connect on my computer and everything was really slow because multiple people
were connected to it. I hardly used it, only when I thought it was important.
Thursday
afternoon, a man came and fixed our internet. All he had to do was replace a
cord that we hadn’t even noticed was broken, it was worn out. I did a happy
dance once it was fixed. A happy dance. Can you believe it? The first thing
that I went to check when he asked us to see if it worked properly was my
Facebook app. Thinking back on that moment, I am now cringing.
For
that week, I was forced to get creative and leave the comfort of my apartment and
find cafes, bars, and restaurants to sit in. Sometimes I went to class
extremely early, other times I would’ve rather not had any wifi then leave my
apartment. Early Friday morning, I left for Greece so I was back to not having
any wifi. There was wifi at times but it was often too slow to do anything. But
I was used to not having wifi for a week so I was not suffering as much as
other people on the trip were.
It
was funny to see in roll reversal how my reactions of not having wifi were now
reflected in other people. Since I hadn’t had wifi the previous week, I came
prepared. It forced me to set my phone down, talk to different people and get
to know others that I had already previously met. I feel like I got to know my
roommates better that previous week because I couldn’t be dependent on my
phone.
I
had no idea how dependent on wifi I was until I didn’t have it anymore. Previously
on Central’s campus, I didn’t use my social media nearly as much as I do here. (I
use it more here because it’s my main source of communication) But I like the
ability and comfort of having the option to scroll even though I didn’t really use
it. It was like having a security blanket and having my security blanket ripped
away from me was truly eye opening.
With
all of that said: I’ll leave you with this quote. I think it is very much true.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain
